John Kerry- The Waffle Man?
I believe I have stumbled upon the a song written about John Kerry! It's called Johnny the Waffle Man, by the artist Sonic Music. At first the meaning was not clear, but then I began to pay more attention to the lyrics...
"There is a candidate
Who would do anything for your love
There is a candidate
Who would say anything for your love
He's Johnny the waffle man
Johnny the waffle man
He says what he wants
Only because he can
He's Johnny the waffle man
Would you like some syrup on your waffles Johnny? x3"
...and it became so very obvious. Listen to it at http://www.sonicmusic.net/mp3... and tell me what you think.
-Revan
Short Story No. 2- Vengeance is Mine, Cessna 172!
Vengeance is Mine, Cessna 172!
"So you understand how this is gonna work, right?" I asked, turning to Axiom, who was staring out the passenger side window on our way to the airport.
"I still don't get why you're doing this," he replied.
"For the last time, that plane has done me wrong, and, as you know, that wrong must be righted. All you need to do is drive to the bridge--you know where--and sit around with the moonroof open."
"Well, okay...Is there anything else?"
"Actually, there's something I need you to pick up along the way......."
Later...
I opened the car door, stepped out, and reached back in for my parachute pack.
"Everything a-okay?" I asked.
"Fine and dandy," answered Axiom,"See you at the bridge."
I slammed the door and slung the pack over my shoulder. Walking toward hangar number one--and the demon that was called a plane--I heard the screeching of tires as Axiom drove away into the night. As I approached the Cessna 172, I noticed two fools vacating the plane in question.
"Hello," said one of the fools,"We are Bob and Dave, and we are wondering why you were approaching this plane in such a sly manner and with a parachute pack, to boot?"
"I am...going skydiving!" I exclaimed.
The second fool, Dave, frowned and said,"Sounds reasonable. The keys are on the dash." The two fools shrugged and left. I watched them go and noticed upon observation that the first fool, Bob, was carrying a snub-nosed .38. With them out of the way, I went to work on the Cessna. Of course, it was unlocked and the keys were inside, so there was not much tomfoolery to engage in. I gingerly hopped inside and flipped the on switch to "on." Next I located the key, and found the fools were true to their word: it was on the dash. The plane roared to life when that same key was turned in the correct slot, and I tapped the throttle to move it out onto the runway.
Within seconds, my headset's speakers blared with the peevish sounds of control tower,"Piper 440, you are not cleared for take off at L17. Repeat. Not cleared for takeoff."
"No speaky English," I replied wittily, and jammed the knob for throttle all the way in.
"Piper 440! You are NOT. CLEARED. FOR. TAKEOFF!"
"No. Speaky. EEENGLISH!" And with that I pulled back on the yoke and took off, something I was obviously not cleared to do.
Meanwhile, the fools were still walking back to their car, or trying to, as they had forgotten where they parked, and that they had no car. Suddenly Bob jerked and exclaimed,"Hey, you can't go skydiving alone! I bet that guy is gonna cause some terrible hurly-burly."
Was I ever. But control tower seemed intent on stopping me.
"Piper 440 request you land immediately."
I flew on.
"Piper 440 if you do not relay your circumstances we will alert the military."
"Well alright, hold o--Tigers on the plane! There are TIGERS ON THE PLANE! ROOOOAR! AIEEEEE!"
"I knew it! I knew you spoke English! Request you land immediately Piper 440."
I did not answer. There were no tigers on the plane of course. I had fabricated that to delay control tower.
"Piper 440?"
"No one here but us tigers."
"Hmm. Just out of curiosity, how many of you are on board?"
"Six. Go away." By now I was nearing the beach, but at once misery returned in the form of yet another voice in my headset.
"Piper 440. This is Bob. Now you land that thar Cessna this instant or I'll shoot yer wings off."
"You would be doing me a favor, Bob."
"Really. So what would get your dander up?"
"If you randomly dive-bombed the street below us."
"HA! You shouldn't-a told me. Prepare to be smote." An instant later the glow of a fireball reflected off my windshield, and I smiled. My glee did not last, however. Control tower came back online.
"Now see here Piper440. I know darn well there ain't any room for any six tigers on that plane."
"Okay. You got me." What the hell did I care if he figured it out?
"Piper 440, I am about to alert the Air Force, or possible the Coast Guard, or , who knows, both?"
"You do and I will....I will...," thinking fast, I said,"Draw obscene doodles on the interior of this aircraft!"
"Noooooooooooooooooo oooo! Okay Piper 440, you win."
"Indeed. Go away." At last I made it to the "drop point." I strapped on my parachute pack, lifted the lever on the door, and jarred it open. I made one last change to the controls and then dropped out of the Cessna. I enjoyed the tumbling for but a second before opening the 'chute, since I was not so high up to begin with. As I floated gently down, I observed the Cessna as it embarked on its slanted descent into the gulf. Finally it was smashed on the waves, and I relished the payback it had received for making me vomit days earlier. I turned my attention to steering the parachute, and guided myself safely down through the moonroof of the waiting car. Cutting the strings of the parachute I lowered myself fully into the car.
Axiom, looking exasperated in the driver's seat, said,"Are we done here?"
"Yes. That is, assuming you did what I asked," I answered.
"Of course," he said, handing over the pizza. Falling back in my seat, I took a bite of my delicious pizza and savored the flare of taste as the ingenious mixture of crust, sauce, and cheese danced on my tongue.
La Fin
What a lovely work of fiction that was. I'll admit it isn't as good as "Duel," but I'd like to hear your thoughts on it too. If you want to know more about what inspired this story read the previous post- "Flying sucks."
-Revan
Flying sucks
Well, so much for all that. These are my thoughts upon landing today, after 36 minutes above ground in a Cessna 172. Surprisingly, I was not at all nervous or jittery leading up to the flight. After taxiing down the runway, I pushed in the knob that controls throttle to get "her" up to speed (this was my sole contribution to the flight, aside from pushing the "on" button and turning the key to start the $#@! thing). Taking off was not bad. I did not even notice we left the ground until I looked out the window. The view was okay, but it's nothing I would write home about. Basically everything looks small and far away, prompting you to think,"Gee, everything is small and far away." And you would be right. It does. The only real interesting thing was the gulf. It was so green. Like some kind of jewel. Probably would be blue if people didn't keep peeing in it. Anyway...
But then I realize the ride is not quite so smooth, and I curse myself for forgetting what roller coasters do to me. Motion sickness. It blows. I alert the pilot of my stomach's desire to leave me body.
"Do you have like a bag or something?" I say.
"Open the window," he says. Oh, boy. So I opened the window and let fly the contents of my stomach. If my breakfast fell on any of you reading this, I apologize. And it is really a shame, because I risked running out of gas to get that hamburger and three others last night. Hopefully the first three were put to good use before the purging. Right, so anyway, I have never been so happy to land before in my life. Not so happy to meet my mom though.
"What happened to your shirt?" she said.
"What do you think happened?!?"
She honestly didn't know. As I said before so much for all that. I had wanted to be a pilot, but no more. It wasn't even a lifelong dream really, I was just sifting through different careers in my mind and thought this would be neat. High pay for essentially just driving in the sky. I'll probably go into game design now, which is something I already know I enjoy. Also, it no longer seems like it's my destiny to hook up with this one girl who wants to be a pilot. I'm pretty sure I can still change my major. The end.
-Revan
First post I have written in a long time because... oh what the hell do you care
ANyway it's been a while as the title suggest, unless you haven't figured out our complex color code system and you didn't know anyone left.
And now that I'm back I have pretty much nothing to say, but I should have a good personal anecdote tomorrow unless said anecdote kills me. That should peak your interest.
But for you to actually be satisfied with this post I will reprint something I just read from a blog that was written about 4 yrs ago that involves computer complaints. Enjoy:
Subject: Computer challenged? Take heart, anyone who believes he/she is
technologically challenged. You "ain't seen nuthin' yet"...
1. Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to "Press
Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the "Any" key is.
2. AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard to
control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic bag
the mouse was packaged in.
3. Another AST customer was asked to send a copy of her defective diskettes.
A few days later a letter arrived from the customer along with photocopies of
the floppies.
4. A Dell technician advised his customer to put his troubled floppy back in
the drive and close the door. The customer asked the tech to hold on and was
heard putting the phone down, getting up and crossing the room to close the
door to his room.
5. Another Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer to fax
anything. After 40 minutes of troubleshooting, the technician discovered the
man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it in front of the monitor
screen and hitting the "send" key.
6. Yet another Dell customer called to complain that his keyboard no longer
worked. He had cleaned it by filling up his tub with soap and water and
soaking the keyboard for a day, then removing all the keys and washing them
individually.
7. A Dell technician received a call from a customer who was enraged because
his computer had told him he was "bad and invalid." The tech explained that
the computer's "bad command" and "invalid" responses shouldn't be taken
personally.
8. A confused caller to IBM was having trouble printing documents. He told
the technician that the computer had said it "couldn't find printer." The
user had also tried turning the computer screen to face the printer but the
computer still couldn't "see" the printer".
9. An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support couldn't get her new
Dell Computer to turn on. After ensuring the computer was plugged in, the
technician asked her what happened when she pushed the power button. Her
response, "I pushed and pushed on the foot pedal and nothing happened." The
"foot pedal" turned out to be the computer's mouse!
10. Another customer called Compaq tech support to say her brand-new computer
wouldn't work. She said she unpacked the unit, plugged it in and sat there
for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen. When asked what happened when
she pressed the power switch, she asked, "What power switch?"
11. Another IBM customer had trouble installing software and rang for
support. "I put in the first disk, and that was OK. It said to put in the
second disk, and I had some problems with that. But when it said to put in
the third disk, I couldn't even fit it in...." The user hadn't realized that
"Insert Disk 2" meant to remove Disk 1 first.
12. In a similar incident, a customer had followed the instructions for
installing software. The instructions said to remove the disk from its cover
and insert into the drive. The user had physically removed the casing of the
disk and wondered why there were problems.
13. From a Novell NetWire Sysop:
Caller: "Hello, is this the Tech Support?"
Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"
Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty
period. How do I go about getting that fixed?"
Tech: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"
Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."
Tech: "Please excuse me. If I seem a bit stumped, it's because I am. Did you
receive this as part of a promotional at a trade show? How did you get this
cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?"
Caller: "It came with my computer. I don't know anything about it being a
promotional. It just has '4X' on it."
At this point, the Tech Rep had to mute the caller because he couldn't stand
it. He was laughing too hard. The caller had been using the load drawer of
the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder and snapped it off the drive.
14. A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer. The
tech asked her if she was running it under Windows." The woman responded,
"No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point. The man sitting
in the cubicle next to me is under a window and his printer is working fine."
15. Tech: "O.K. Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same
time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the
letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager."
Customer: "I don't have a 'P'."
Tech: "On your keyboard, Bob."
Customer: "What do you mean?"
Tech: "P" on your keyboard, Bob."
Customer: "I'm not going to do that!"
-Revan
Over-done
I way, way over-do myself, things I do, and things I say. I must not be as bright as I think I am. Self control is therefore now on the cutting edge of my self mental development.
Sometimes I'm ok, others I feed words and ideas into someone that doesn't need it. If anyone that understands what I am talking about and is familiar with the stuff I am describing, I appologize. My intent is never to mess with you or ruin anything. I love to help people. But I think I am actually trying too hard in some cases. I have to let my thoguhts be mine and let theres be theres.....
Appologies to all..... sorry for anything I may have done to bother you
-Axiom
Anger
I've got a few views on this emotion, like I normally do, so here comes another one.
To me anger is power. I'm reffering to a true a pure anger, not over a simple issue related to meaningless points. It's power. I believe is like this:
Anger brings to a person the will and ability to overcome their problem. It brings to the mind a complete focus on success. It's the only thing that will flow through a mind until a solution to this issue. Again, not any pathetic issue. I'm reffering to great theft, murder, or other issues of the same impact. Anger courses adrenaline through your veins whenever you might hit it hard, and strongly when you need it. Adrenaline sharpens your eyes, increases your strength, quickness, and speed. The anger can therefore bring what is neccessary.
And now, even broken down to sports-related events. Hatred can exist. Opponents can be friends on the lands and enemies on the courts. The use of anger is what will motivate and assist one to their goal. It can be placed of your own intension, to drive yourself harder. Anger nnatrually pushes the body belong where it is, because you must win over whatever it is. You must win. There are two views, in reality, related to anger and its potentials. Life and Death. Anger is what can survive. It must be your choice to accept its power if you need them. Sit back and take the problem and you die. Life and death are used as a perception or representative of events. Victory is life, loss is death. Anger pushes one to what the should get. It can bring them to where they should be. Anger should be accepted through either physical use or even only through mental implications. Develope your solutions thanks to the motivation.
Ok, that's kind of a bizzare....something...that I have done. I've got a stange and/or even twisted mind maybe? I don't know how or why I put those together. But I just felt like it. It could be crap or it could carry meaning. I don't know.
All concepts are greatfully appreciated.
-Axiom
Can You Name This Song?
It's the music that fits the end of an amazing scene, mostly athletic, that goes along with slow motion, of course. It's only on piano. Here is my best attempt to describe it in letters.
dun da di de da da
dun da di de de
dun da di de da dun
da da dun dun di
That's the best I have and that not make any sense to you. It goes slow, and if you pronounce those "words" in order it sound like it. It's all over movies. Anyone know it???
It drives me nuts to not know something so simple. I love comments, so feel free.
-Axiom<.font>
Tennis
I completely understand that it takes time for sports abilities to develope. I'm not complaining about how much I suck at tennis right from the start, because I am supposed to be. And I am terrible. It's so bad it's not even funny. But I have several weeks in the class to get better. And I will continue myself on my own if it is neccessary to be decent.
The point that I am basically making is that sports or anything that you can win or lose stick themselves in my mind and I must learn it. I can't explain it.
Basically I am a bit insane I guess? I can't help it. It's like an addiction.
I don't have anything else to say for now but I have a story I will post later.
-Axiom
Keystone, Colorado
Keystone. That is the name of the "city" I was staying at. Its about an hour drive from Denver to the west. this place was amazing. First of all I had never seen snow before. I could see it all over the fields before the plane was landing. Soft, powder snow. It was amazing. We stayed in a Ski lodge right next to Keystone mountain. You could see the entired thing from your balcony. Two bedrooms, two bathrooms, three televisions, living room, fire place, and full kitchen. I could have lived there, with no problem. A few of the rooms are owned. People's names are on the from room number plate rather than the number.
The mountain was unbelievable. It snowed for about two days of our four days of skiing. I am the only family member to have made a mistake at that mountain. I'm the only one to take a begginer's course over the bunny slopes.
I had been skiing pretty well and I thought I would handle it no problem. I thought the hardeest feature was its lengh, three-and-a-half miles long.
The problems started right at the beggining. Over the entire course there were about ten drops, some around turns. On average I'd say they are about thirty degrees down angled, and more. I used my same solid ski method, but the fast drops screwed me up. I couldn't turn hard because of the speed it causes. Obviously not a lot by any means, but to me it felt like I was flying. The bottom of the drops luckily leveled off, mostly, but right after that there were huge signs that said "SLOW". I slowed down as much as I could and I always managed to stop before the next drop.
Here are the other things:
I was thrown through the air and snow a total of seven times during my trip down the path. Several times I had to completely ditch, because I may have ran staight into people, who were just standing there for some reason. And most of the time, I could not control myself when trying to turn, slow down, or maintain myself at the speeds. If I could just fly straight down the drops without any issues, I would have been fine. Luckily I've discovered that to me it does not hurt to fall in the snow. My crashes got harder and worse as the course went on. The first one, my legs just slipped out in front of me the same way I used to ditch out. Most of the others somehow ended with me literally sailing through the air for about five yards, hitting the downslope snow, losing the skis and poles. No pain at all, I'd get up and laugh at myself. A long sketch was left in the snow, from me and the equipment. I am pretty sure that my longest crash was thirty or more yards. Those were fun. I get up covered in snow. Snow in my boots, my gloves, into my helmet. I'd click on the skis and just keep going. The second to last drop was that record drop. It sloped around fourty degrees and curved hard to the left with a partial sudden uphill section. Luckily I crashed far enough away when I tried to turn that I did not fly off the uphill piece. I survived my final drop, because it led to flat ground and no more drops. This one was the most extreme. About fifty degrees and more. I stopped, looked down it, and decided to just gun it. That was the fastest I'd ever gone on skis, and I managed to make a perfect stop at the end. It took me around an hour I believe.. probably less but I never kept track of time.
The last note to make about that course is that it had two places to lead. It led to one side of the mountain or the other. I got the directions of an employee, and I memorized every piece of it. Then, after I went down the last drop and realized I wasn't in the right place, I was pissed lightly. I followed every turn, without a doubt. There was a sign at each intersection of the courses. Luckily my family had swithed their side on the mountain, because the had not seen me on there side for a long time. We arrived there at the same time, actually.
Oh, there is one more thing. About midway down the course, I was reattaching my skis and suddenly I here yelling. I look to my left were the other course meets this one and crosses it, and I picked up words of some ancient war type battle from some skiers. I finally saw them as they went by, and they were only five guys in Irish clothing. They had huge, plastic swords in their hands, and I guess they just needed to enjoy themselves. Just going down weilding these baldes and yelling. Oh, and they were wearing only a blue Irish kilts with a left-side shoulder strap. ONLY THAT AND NOTHING MORE. It was fifteen degrees out that day. Snowing. And they were about 15,000 feet up on this mountain. Nuts.
Now, I talk about the flight home. The day we woke up, it was the coldest day in Colorado's current winter. Five degrees. Five. Our plane was delayed from 12:35pm to 1:00pm, because of all the delay they have had. As we are rolling down the waiting line for takeoff, from our window seat right about the left wing, we could see ice covering the entire piece. The whole wing was covered with ice that looked about an inch thick. We had started off with completely clean wings, so we had to co back to de-icing before takeoff. We did not take off until two thirty. At least there were some pretty good audio stations to listen to. And we could listen to all the talking between planes and the tower, which was great. On top of that I had my Ipod for an enertainment emergency. They didn't play a movie for us this time, but on the way there they played the most recent Harry Potter movie. I do not love that movie, but at least there was something in front of my face for most of the four hours. Our flight there was four hours, but home it was only three hours. Probably because he had the plane refilled with fuel before we left, so he could go faster. No problems with either flight.
Well, that's pretty much all the stories I have to tell as of now. Maybe I will give more later.
-Axiom
Spam- art in disguise?
I got some spam as always today, and it seems spammers have a new tactic--writing crap words in the text box and inserting a picture with the real message. The poem below is the seemingly random words making up the text. I have not altered it except to put it into stanzas. The last line is an excerpt from the picture, which discussed some stock...
Spam
jagged a moral bemused,
of decriminalize.
to and haven the disappear,
is bodily digress with decoy
degeneration splash,
sieve was noxious the unpredictable
lair ground floor!!!
abstention myriad.
booking iceberg grating a teamwork
neuroses conical
ACT tombstone one-upmanship
decriminalize as walker,
and punch,. ecumenical. two-bit manic.
but tollgate cannery eyelid, influx childcare stam
(You can lose all your money by investing in this stock)
Could it be deeper than it seems? Look at the enthusiasm in the middle of stanza three; that must indicate some burgeoning emotion. And "tombstone one-upman ship"--is this a clever comment on society in disguise?
-Revan
Vacation
Big vacation for me. On this day at four o'clock I will be 30,000 feet above sweet American soils. And of course all the crappy factories, crack head, etc. But I will forget about them, because the destination is Colorado. I'vw never been to Colorado, or on a plane. So thise will be a great four days.
Snowboarding. That is my plan. The subject that I have put I physical mental mind towards to prepare myself for my second experience (the first was rediculously short and terrible, 6 years ago when I was completly inactive on a normal day). If there are any real snowboarders out there, I'd love some advice/comments.
I'm pretty good with physics. It's something that works decently in my mind. So I'm going to summarize most of my thoughts on simply how to ride it without killing yourself. Strap in your seat belts... here we go again with my mind...
Balance of course is key. I've got exellect balance so that will not be a problem.
One of my main concerns is proper steering/turning, or whatever you will call it. Im right handed, so of course my left foot will be at the front for my easiest style. I have a lot of experience skimboarding, could this be comparable at all positively or negatively?. It's the right leg (or whichever back leg one would use) that is dedicated to steering. Swing to the left, go right. Swing right, go left. Of course do not "swing" (I don't have another word for that...) violently, unless stopping or in important need, because I would probably throw myself over the snow for a nice birds-eye view. Anything right there?
Generall speed and generall control. Leaning/applying weigth to my front left leg would ad forward speed, and make it harder to turn leaning forward (especially for inexperienced). A wise idea for me will probably to relax my body stance over ther board to be in my own central gravity point, so I have control of whatever I need to do. How does that sound?
Into some details I will go. Turning and/or sharp turning. Leaning in the direction you intend to go, left is forward for me and right is backward, should be done with a body in the athletic stance it would assume on its own. One may be taught, of course, but everything is natural. Turn easy, lean lightly. Turn sharply lean deeper. The last thing I believe about turning is that the best way to maintain your speed to whatever you choose would be to weave steadily and constanly from left to right. Maybe its called a tick-tack style like in sail boats? The rough part of that that I can see is, if the course your are doing is used by a lot of people, your focus would have to double from where you are going to where they are going. Does that make it more difficult?
Hmm......
I hold no other direct points to make... Any comments about anything related will be highly appreachiated, and useful to me.
I'm glad to say that although I will be gone shortly, Revan will still be here, of course. With many interesting posts I'm sure. Idealy I would be able to access a computer in my hotel. It's very possible.
Good by for now!
-Axiom
Another piece of random
"Mistake"
Some times, big mistakes, worthless, and some you cannot see. Guilt. Crumpled paper balls. Fix the mistake. Do not let it burn.
Well those are the random things that got their way in. Any comments at all? I consider myself to be a bit proberly insane.
-Axiom
Lonely
Lonely
Lonely is a self-created disease. People think it hit them, but they pull it into themselve. It is the need to Feel. No Feeling is not human. It is the choice of Feeling that matters. Lonely is self-torture. Pain brought in by ones mind, purpose and will. It is a choice. Anything you want is there. Catch it yourself or drop life.
Comments of any type are loved. Thanks!
-Axiom
Possibly the dumbest post I have ever written
You know you want to find out your True Squirrel Name! After all, I did!
The squirrel name for my real identity is Lieutenant McTwitch.
Axiom's true identity is General Fluffycheeks.
For "Revan" it is Major McBush,
And "Axiom" is Captain Nutkins
Just for fun I put in "pastordave" too, which comes up as "Dave Nutless." I thought maybe the site had something against pastors but "pastorbob" came out as "Colonel Bignuts," so I'm guessing it does not...Have no fear pastordave, your real name will probably come up as something more manly.
If you would like to know your true squirrel name, go to
-Revan
Poem #6- Pizza Gone Awry
This is just a fun little poem about a piece of cold pizza fighting back. Enjoy.
Pizza Gone Awry
You want
To eat me
But you cannot reheat me
This time the end won't be "devoured"
Unwrap
My tin cage
Unleash my undying rage
Prepare to face a wrath so strong
I leap!
You stumble
You will regret this fumble
A sense of justice is igniting the air
The fridge has left me cold and hard as daimonds
I fling myself into a storm
And now
The blood of life has left Colossus
Yeah!
I'm free and my crust is without tarnish
-Revan
High school is done for me
I am done with high school!
As of today, I've earned my last credit, economics. I got a 75% in the class, But I don't care. I'm smart enough as it is.
For the last weeks of classes, I have the greatest schedule ever:
Teacher's Assisstant
Tennis
Yearbook
News Paper
Basicly I'm going to a free club area to hang out with all my friends. Life is Good.
Hahaha I'm just showing it off to be bragging 
-Axiom
Today's Album Art Sucks
Today's album art sucks. I was just reading an article in the paper about this; apparently the writer has been reading my blog, which is obviously where he got the idea. He's mainly right on that point, but he cites Whipped Cream as his preferred album art, which consists of a woman clothed only in whipped cream, with certain assets less covered than the rest. Egad. The writer liked how the woman was in her natural "beauty" as opposed to the airbrushing done today. I'm guessing Playboy was the same way before computerized picture editing, but that is no reason to condone it.
Most of the album art I see today is pretty mundane, the worst of it being when the artist (or the record company) feels it's best to just plaster the artist's face on the cover and hope that sells. I think the most laughable case of this is the 50 Cent cd where it shows him looking all muscular, but it's not a picture; it's a drawing of what that might look like. On the other side of the equation we have the female artists. It's quite sad how a lot of them start out innocent, but then turn out to be just another sex object. Case in point: Shakira's Oral Fixation album art, which makes the profound statement,"I'm almost naked!"
Once again, I trumpet the album art of prog rock! It tends to be adventurous and sometimes sci-fi, and it truly ties into the music, as if to say, "This is the world you are transported to when you listen to this cd." Take Satellite's "A Street Between Sunrise and Sunset" for example:
-Revan
My Bands
Due to lack of interest, I am going to ... keep posting about the bands I like! Never surrender, baby! Actually, screw that. The remaining bands I haven't told you about are Satellite, Sonic Pulsar, Mostly Autumn, Transatlantic, and Singularity. They are all good, except the first Sonic Pulsar album which for the most part sucks.
Old business: what?
New business: For regular school I'm exempting exams, and for college it's spring break so I might post something significant, maybe a poem or a story.
Ok this post really sucks; I need something to spice it up, maybe some profound thought or something. Let's see..."It's better to be pissed off than pissed on"...no...Ok have you ever wonder why we tip waiters? I mean of all people to tip why them? It's like, big whoop, you brought my food out and I have no way of knowing whether you spat on it. If you want more money get a better job. We don't tip firemen for keeping our houses from burning down. We don't tip soldiers for protecting us. We don't tip mechanics for not tampering with the brakes this time. Yeah. Think about it.
-Revan
Pride
Today, it's pride. Now I have no perfect definition for it. Everything you'll read will be my random thoughts.
Self control
Bravery
Humble
Belief
Will
Respect
Courage
Now I know those are basically a good definition, so now you will see my true thoughts about it.
Pride makes or breaks a person. Hold on with what you want and what you have or They bring you down. Keep control, know your intent, it's up to you. Keep your head high or They will just beat you to the ground. They are critical, subjective, cruel, and controling. They as a people follow it naturally. The only way for anyone to reach the top means risk. Good or bad, rigt or wrong are not defined in society. What's right is right and whats right is wrong. There is no way to guarentee anything. Pride is a source of you power. Pride is your ability to make your own life. Pride is the ability to drive for what you want. Pride is your ability to be humane and decent. Pride is your ability to pick yourself up from the ground. Pride is your understanding, your ability to take death in the face of what you want. Execution or murder, be able to hold your head high. Just know the pride.
Well, that is in no way anything poetic or story based, of course. I felt like righting it, and personally I think it's my worst statement post ever.
Commennter are appreciated
-Axiom
The Flower Kings
Band two is the Flower Kings, led by lead vocal/guitarist/composer/ probablyalotmoretoo Roine Stolt, who also did vocals and guitar in the Tangent, but has left that band. Flower Kings songs are for the most part very happy and adventurous, with numerous melodies throughout; there's not ever one line that's just beaten to death, and it's all good. The subgenre of the FKs is symphonic rock. Now for the progarchives.com definition:
"The aspect of orchestration is the most important characteristic. Songs will be longish, contain extended solos for emphasis, changes in time and tempo, and more than any other category highlighted by strong dynamics and changes in mood. Very much an album oriented classification, like classical rock much was borrowed in terms of arrangement and structure. Lyrics involve many aspects, but typically more philosophical or fantasy oriented even in their telling of modern day subjects."...which pretty much says it all. Sometimes the lyrics are Christian-oriented, as in most of the first album Roine Stolt's The Flower King (the flower king is Jesus (duh)). I also have The Rainmaker and Space Revolver as well, but I found The Flower King to be the most accessible. If you like depressed or angry music, this is not the band for you, but if you are trying to escape those types you might want to check out the FKs. At www.kinesiscd.com/index.html, look in the sale section and you'll see that The Flower King, The Rainmaker, and Space Revolver are all just $7.99 each (plus shipping).
-Revan
The Tangent
"The Neo-Progressive subgenre of progressive rock grew out of a movement in the early 1980s by a number of U.K.-based bands that focused on music that was deeper than new wave, both instrumentally and lyrically...The music holds a much more lush sound than general rock, but lacks the sophistication of truly symphonic progressive bands like Yes or amel. Instrumentally, the bands tend to be characterized by a "noodling" approach that focuses on dynamic solos, and at its best, neo-prog lyrics are deep, insightful, and acerbic. Whether neo-prog is diluted progressive or adventurous pop depends on the point of view of the listener"
So there you have it. Now the album itself...
1. In Darkest Dreams (20:06)- The first thing you notice about the song is it is over twenty minutes. Those of you new to prog might think this means there are ten verses and twenty repetitions of the chorus, but this is not so. The first vocals come at about the 4 min. mark; these are done as spoken word for the most part, and Stolt's voice definitely takes some getting used to. On your first listen you will probably be thinking,"Wha....?" however it's not that inaccessible and on the second listen when you have more of an idea what to expect you will be able to appreciate it for the masterpiece it is. After some time the song shifts tone in the more sad and relaxing "In Darkest Dreams" movement, which could easily stand alone as a great song itself. The vocals here are done by Manning and Tillison who sound almost exactly the same and have more ordinary (but strong) voices. Did I mention the sax? The Tangent employs both saxes and flute in their music. For this album it is either an alto or tenor, but for the next I am pretty sure it is a tenor. Anyway, saxes are awesome and everyone should use them.
2. The Canterbury Sequence(8:06)- It's hard to describe canterbury-style music. It is sort of light and playful with some (but not all) lyrics being of the "da dada daaa" sort. It reminded me of the soundtrack to Rouge's levels in Sonic Adventure 2, but much more masculine. Lots of flute in this one.
3. Up-hill From Here (7:11)- This one has a fast, driving beat and powerful vocals. Also midway through there is the best guitar solo I had ever heard at the time.
4. The Music That Died Alone (12:45)- The title track opens with a piano solo that sounds like you're in an upscale restaurant or something. A good song, it is more reminiscent of the Canterbury Sequence than it is the others.
If you do decide to look into prog rock, The Music That Died Alone is a great way to start. It's available at Amazon for a reasonable price. If you're looking for something more accessible, stay tuned...
-Revan
Today's Music Sucks
Today's music sucks. I do not mean all of it, just all of it that is popular, that is winning Grammys--this is the music that sucks. Take "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" for example, which won either best song or best record. "Broken Dreams" is boring as hell and made me want to kill myself before the end of the first listen (that was hyperbole, but not by much). If you've never heard it, it starts out like, "I walk this lonely road, something something something something...[now the guitar part] daDA Dada daDA DAAAAda" and on and on and on. Also the vocals are whiny and annoying. This is characteristic of all recent rock music:
1. uninventive music,
2. paltry lyrics that are almost always about being a victim of your girlfriend or some other authority (not surprisingly, most of these bands are anti-Bush)
3. vocals that are either yelling or girly whining, never harmonizing or becoming another instrument
4. no solos anymore, not even guitar solos
5. The beat--and only the beat--drives it, and bands use speed to make up for a lack of composing skills
6. They give the public what it wants, and the public wants more of the same crap. They don't want to make the best song ever, they want to make the best-selling song ever.
7. Music videos. What the hell is up with those? Music is an auditory experience dammit
Basically what I'm saying is that it is trapped in templates (not even good templates), it's all the same, and it just plain sucks. Of course, other genres suck too; I was just forced to listen to "adult contemporary" in the car and boy did it hurt. I could rant about rap, hip hop, country etc. but they are not really in the forefront today. So what is the solution? I have found it in progressive rock, or prog for short. Take this sort-of definition from progarchives.com:
"Progressive rock artists sought to move away from the limitations of radio formatted rock and pop, and "progress" rock to the point that it could achieve the sophistication of jazz or classical music. It is admired by its fans for its complexity, requiring a high level of musical virtuosity to perform. Critics have often derided the genre as pompous and self-indulgent. This is because, unlike such stylistically consistent genres as country or hip hop, progressive rock is difficult to define in a single conclusive way. "
Over the next couple weeks, I'll be showcasing each of prog bands I've found so you can get to know them, and I can have something to write about.
-Revan
Red
I can't explain how or why it jumped in. I was watching TV yesterday, doing nothing, with my random writing pad right next to me, and suddenly I added "Red"
Pashion, lust, greed, anger, force, power, speed, strenght......All of these float through when "Red" is in my mind.
What will I write from this?
It may help me write my book if I keep writing short stories and such.
I don't know...Give me your opinions on Red!!! I'd love to hear them.
-Axiom
Random News 3/01/06
Two interesting things I've found in the business section recently:
1. Taser shotguns have been invented! For those of you wondering why one would need to blow a 1 ft. diameter hole in someone AND stun them, let me explain. The main purpose for developing such a weapon was to increase the effective range in which you could tase someone. I always thought shotguns had a very messy accuracy at long range, but I guess this one is different...It shoots out a cluster of whatevers--apparently not moving at terminal velocity, as that would defeat the purpose--that stun the victim on impact. Some people are up in arms about tasers because they (the tasers) have been cited in something like 280 deaths. These people are probably not going to be satisfied until police use nothing but hugs to apprehend the subjects. And even then, you'd probably have some die of suffocation...hugging can get brutal...moving on....
2. A man was arrested at a Church's Chicken recently after employees activated the silent alarm, thinking the man's pouch had a gun in it. He was also talking in a condescending manner, as he was on file to receive two free meals, probably after some screw-up. This raises many questions, all of them being,"Who the hell wears a freaking pouch?!?" The man was set free by the cops when they realized there was not actually a burglary in progress and that wearing a pouch was not a felony, although several are on record saying it should be (ok not really). The man then got his two meals, went out to his car, and.... this is the big twist here; he's gonna eat the chicken and live happily ever after right?....nooo.....and screams like a maniac and throws the chicken everywhere. Seriously. That is the truth. "I was just so mad." Those were his words. He is also suing Church's, so be sure to stick close to this guy when and if he collects his damages...
-Revan
Good news about writing
-Axiom
Sense
Hmm...I'm seeing this next story might also be very dark..very dark appears to be my bread-and-butter. If it's a long story, it should be like reading and ultra short book. I'm looking into doing that so my writing will get better every time I use it. I think I'm doing well right now, but of course I want to push it farther.
Well, Tbloggers, the story will come eventually. Until then enjoy our other posts. We tend to have several every week, and they are pretty good.
-Axiom