Casual Harangues

I got into my oft-mentioned first relationship by gradually coming to like the girl over the course of about a year, until it was obvious to both of us that we liked each other, at which point I finally asked her out.  Well I can't do that anymore, because 1) I don't have any more single female friends, and 2) a year is a long time for a lonely college student to wait for love.

So! I was looking on the Craigslist w4m section for laughs one day, and one profile actually got my eye.  Why, this girl seemed like a decent person! And above all, real!  (If you've been on CL, you know this is rare)

After a couple weeks of emailing each other, we went on a date! It was great! We saw Up in 3-D.  Since then we've been on one other date (that didn't go as well), and it seems now she doesn't have time for me.  This may be because of her classes, but we'll see.

More details later.

-Revan

I only just now realized the irony of naming the notepad document containing the first poem to my ex "doomedtofail.txt".  At the time I meant the poem was doomed - I'd never finish it, come up with anything good, etc.

Well, I came up with something good (she loved it, anyway).  I'll spare the character attacks for now, but the odd thing about love poems is... what do you write?  You sit there at your laptop, or with pen and paper, and it suddenly occurs to you that maybe there isn't that much amazing about the object of your affection that's just waiting to burst out of your heart and into prose.

(Okay, the real problem is you don't know how to describe what you feel, but bear with me here - I am still bitter.)

A good poem needs a good idea, regardless of inspiration.  The idea for this one came from a book about black holes, by Neil DeGrasse Tyson.  The title - 'Spaghettification' - describes happens when you fall into a black hole: the gravity is so great, the part of you nearest the black hole is pulled harder and stretches out.  Presumably too fast to notice, but nevertheless....

Spaghettification

Some time ago
this black hole of yours
was spotted near my galaxy
But no stars of mine trembled
and no planets gave worry
Still...
There were those curious...

Thoughts peeled away from my outer rim,
circled you tentatively,
and were lost, suddenly.
Bound securely, any new ponderings
inevitably arced back

And you edged closer,
bringing more of your force to bear

My constellations, my intentions
You reconfigured, you snared
My quarks, my senses
You charmed, you overwhelmed

The dark matter, the MACHOs,
the hidden desires,
They flared to life
and scorched the fabric of space/time
so quickly were they yours

My will swung back,
eluding the onslaught.
But.
Too late was the struggle,
for too great was the attraction.
Splintering, it surrendered

Cosmic bodies all sorts
burst under tidal forces
hurled gushing rivers of matter
combining, surging,
cascading into the void
until my own black hole alone remained

From this pilfered expanse
one expects a sharp cold
Yet,
Warm fuzziness pervades all

Now we two singularities,
drawing near,
with feverish anticipation
What will occur
when our event horizons touch?

-Revan

A couple years ago, I wrote about the university planting orange trees around campus, so students could "grab a snack on the way to class."  At the time, I remarked that this idea was supremely RETARDED, but I have grown since then, and in my new-found maturity I am able to look back and high-five my past self.

Because the orange trees are here, my friends, and there are no oranges. 

I'm pretty sure this was engineered by the student senate, and I'm pretty sure some obscene amount of my tuition (read: any amount) goes to fund their shenanigans.

Some students of course, are very much involved in this sort of thing; they are passionate about how to waste our tuitions and truly believe the opposing party is comprised of the scum of the earth.  Then naturally there is always the party with the silly name to show you that they are wacky, down-to-earth, anti-authority folks just like you and me, and they have new and progressive ways of wasting your money.

You can never vote to dissolve the senate; the option simply does not appear on the ballots.  It should.

-Revan

Another year-long absence, another update.

The girlfriend from the last post is gone now, thank goodness.  I'm slow and it was my first relationship... it took me a long time to realize I wasn't happy and even longer to realize she didn't care.  Basically, she thought since she wanted very little from me I wasn't allowed to want anything myself.  She got everything she wanted and more; meanwhile I was left with a near-constant feeling of frustration.  Fourteen months is a long time to live like that.

You can't keep giving and expect everything to be right.  No one cares if you're a martyr.  This is what I have learned.

I am hard at work on more literary goodness for you people.  I realize my last few contributions to CH were lackluster, but these are better!  The magic has returned.  Maybe.

I actually composed some rather spectacular writing over the break; unfortunately these dealt with my girlfriend.  Two poems, plus extensive Star Wars fan fiction involving my ex (Don't ask).  I might post the poems though.

-Revan